I’ve just been given some homework to do by our K8. She is worried that my neurons need exercising.
She has sent me five questions to answer.
1. If you were to come back as an animal in your next life, what would that animal be and why?
I would like to come back as a bunny rabbit.
Rabbits have a lot of fun
And so there are a lot of them.
Because there are a lot of them,
Rabbits have a lot of fun.
2. What would you do with 2 million euros?
I will never have two million. I don’t do the Lottery and I have no rich elderly relations. Having that amount of money would be a terrifying responsibility. I would know the cost of everything and the value of nothing. I would live in fear of my loved ones being kidnapped, and even worse, would have to cope with relations swinging from the chandeliers and fawning all over me.
3. If you were Queen for a day, what would you do to change the world?
I would dissolve the monarchy and send my kids and grandkids out to do an honest days work. I would ask Oxfam to come and collect all the valuables. Buckingham Palace would be turned into a respite care centre. My country piles would be turned into homes for the bewildered. I would call for an end to all bloodsports, but first I would shoot all the bloody corgis who are always hanging around the house and piddling on my carpet.
4. If there was to be a film made about you, who would you choose to play the leading role? (Actress can be living or deceased!)
I would have Dame Judy Dench play the leading role.
5. Your fairy godmother grants you a dinner date with anybody from the past, present or future. Your choice. Who would that be?
It would be nice to have dinner with Maeve Binchy. She’s great craic and she would be good company. There would be no awkward silences and sitting beside her would make me look thin.
Ah mammy. You’re a real melon twister!
‘Scuse me, but what does that mean?
Hello Granny,
The Blog world has been a dreary place without you.
Welcome back and please stay and play, the world needs you.
I take it you, like me hate being put on the spot with questions like the above 5.
I treat them a little like chain letters – in the bin they go!
Thank you Grannymar. I’ll do the best I can.
It’s the ol’ CFSssssssssssss…….. I don’t know my ass from my elbow.
Hello Granny,
Nice to read you again. You are quite right, you know. If you would like to look younger and thinner, you have to hang around with people who are older and fatter.
That said, if you should come to see me you would look so much younger and slimmer you would have to call up Dame Judy and tell her the part of Granny is being recast. It will now be played by Orla Fitzgerald.
Granny,
I know those days…. yesterday I found myself sitting on my elbows!
Sean says ‘Hello ‘ he is smiling on my desktop. Now when I have a problem I just sit and talk to him.